It might be difficult for some parents to read through, but here’s a top ten list that I’ve been wanting to write for a while. What are the worst mistakes parents who are Christians make with their teens?

1. Expecting your teen to have a devotion to God that you do not have. You are teaching your teen what discipleship looks like “in the flesh.”
2. Not expressing genuine love and like to your teen. It’s easy for parents to become a harping voice instead of an encouraging, empowering one.
3. Outsourcing your teen’s spiritual formation. Ultimately, you are charged with teaching and modeling to your teen what follow Jesus means.
4. Not prioritizing church involvement. If you want your teen to have a dynamic, flourishing faith, they must be connected with a local church.
5. Holding low expectations for your teen. Your teen can be brilliant, creative, selfless, and mature. They are leaving the “kid” phase behind.
6. Trying to be your teen’s best friend. Parents are told to bring God’s flourishing rule into their family’s life.
7. Permissive parenting. Parents shrug their shoulders, ask, “What can you do?” and let their teens “figure things out for themselves.”
8. Spoiling your teen. A continual stream of money and stuff causes teens to never be satisfied and always wanting more.
9. Letting your teen’s activities take top priority for your family. A frenetic schedule teaches your teen that “the good life” is a hyper-active one.
10. Not spending time with your teen. Teens secretly are longing for the securing and grounding that comes from consistent quality time.

Accept direction from God, decide to repent, share your struggles and hypocrisy with your family, and then you can parent in a positive, powerful way.