The expression ‘burning bridges’ obviously originated in the literal act of destroying structures used to cross over rivers and other barriers. By destroying them it prevented anyone, friend or foe, from traversing the obstacle. No one could come over to you but, likewise, you could not go to them.  It was a permanent and final action.

Today we most commonly use the phrase figuratively to denote the termination of relationships and associations. Not only have these connections been broken, but also the means to restore them has been removed. There is no going back.

Sadly, this often happens among brethren in the body of Christ. A harsh word spoken, a hateful act taken, a simple disagreement mishandled – and suddenly a full-fledged ‘bridge fire’ ensues. Long friendships and close bonds are broken. Where once there was a valuable spiritual kinship, now there is deep alienation. And, what’s worse, the way back is gone. The ‘bridge’ has been ‘burned.’

The Lord’s instructions actually give us the methodology to avoid these relational disasters. If I am the offending party, I am to go to the one I have wronged and make amends (Matt. 5:23,24). If I am the one who has been wronged, I am to address the one who has caused the fault (Matt. 18:15ff). If both parties in the dispute are committed to this divine plan, ‘bridges’ need never come down.

The unfortunate reality is that brethren too often allow simple, resolvable issues to become massive problems. Sometimes the conflicts grow so large and complex that even ‘the wisdom of Solomon’ cannot solve them. Knowing that this potential for ‘burned bridges’ and permanent separation exists, we should be extremely careful in the maintenance of our precious relationships. “Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind” (1 Peter 3:8 ESV).

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