In many ways, the home is a microcosm of the church. If a man learns to exercise God-given authority in the home, in the manner that God directs, then he has the necessary ability to exercise a very similar form of authority in the larger venue of the church. The apostle declares this point in this manner: "one who rules his own house well, having his children in submission with all reverence (for if a man does not know how to rule his own house, how will he take care of the church of God?)" (1 Tim. 3:4-5).

This is a critical part of an elder's training. It is crucial experience. God has given men leadership and authority over their wives and children in the home (1 Cor. 11:3; Eph. 5:22-23; 6:4). Yet, a man can't exercise that authority through brute force or by merely demanding they obey his orders. He must lovingly lead and guide his family, putting their needs before his own, teaching them that following his lead is God's will, not merely his own.

The parallel should be clear. The authority of elders isn't like that of a corporate chief or military officer. He must lovingly lead the flock of God over which he has oversight, teach members that obedience isn't merely to his opinions or desires, but to God's declared and codified will.

More often than not, the obstacle to Christian men serving as elders is past failure at home. This is sad. It isn't something that a man can go back and repair, in most cases. It also suggests the need to teach young men and women more earnestly about the need to live faithful to God's standards from the very beginning of their married lives. And it suggests that waiting to preach on the eldership until the need arises is shortsighted.

When we look at the qualifications for elders as a whole, we see they involve the totality of a man's experience, reputation, domestic relations, character, habits, knowledge, and capacity to teach others.

These domestic qualifications never have been of greater importance than in the present generation. Our culture knows nearly nothing about the godly exercise of authority. In fact, authority itself is largely disdained. Such disdain, combined with the impact of radical feminism, has resulted in a vacuum of home leadership or a perversion of God's plan for such.

The popular mythology of home leadership today is "joint" or "shared" leadership involving husband and wife. Such is oxymoronic, if one has any sense of true leadership. So, it is not surprising that many brethren, under such influence, seek to direct both home and church by "committee" or some amorphous method of "collective agreement."

God has authority, which He exercises. His earthly shepherds also have authority, and must know how to exercise it correctly.

- 2010 Truth Magazine Lectures, pages 126-127