Children are not exempt from the commands of God. They receive a simple, yet important, command: "Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 'Honor your father and mother,' which is the first commandment with promise: 'that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth'" (Eph. 6:1-3). Children are to learn to respect and obey God by respecting and obeying their parents. If they cannot learn this simple lesson in the days of their youth they are in for a hard life here and torment in eternity.

However, the command to "honor" one's father and mother applies well beyond the days of one's youth. It is to be a guiding principle throughout one's life.

In First Timothy chapter five, Paul gives the "qualifications" of a widow who is to be taken care of by the local church. She must be a widow "indeed." It is in this context that Paul makes three statements regarding the responsibility of grown children to take care of their aged parents.

Notice the clear points made in the above passages. Children are to take care of their aged parents. It is God's way for them to "repay" their parents for caring for them and raising them when they were young and in need of help. A child is not to allow the church to be burdened in caring for their parents when they have the ability to do so themselves. To fail to care for one's parents in their time of need is a shameful action which denies the faith (the clear instruction of Scripture): that is, one cannot claim to be following the teachings of Christ if he is neglecting the care of his parents.

We live in a time in which there is not as great a burden placed upon children to care for their aging parents as there was in the First Century. Many retired people receive social security and retirement from their years of employment. There are government programs in place which provide care for seniors. So, the need for the kind of care spoken of in the Bible is not as urgent for us as it has been for people in other times and cultures. However, the responsibility is still present.

It is a shameful thing for children to abandon the care of their parents. I have lived in a number of places as a gospel preacher. In some of these places, I have seen able-bodied adults neglect the care of their aging parents. At times, the burden has been passed along to the members of the local church. Christians ask their brethren to run them to doctor's appointments when their grown children and grandchildren live in the area and could do this for them. I remember at one place about 20 members of the church showed up at an older member's house to do some much needed repair work, yard work, and painting. I later learned that this woman had several grown children living in the same town. Not one family member was present to help that day. It was shameful.

Often times, when this kind of thing happens, it is pointed out that the neglectful children are not Christians and thus are not subject to the instructions in First Timothy. I disagree! All people are subject to the Law of God. However, even if they are ignorant of the Scriptures, doesn't common decency count for something? Someone may point out that the children have no real relationship with their parents because of a prior incident. I do not want to meddle into a family's personal business, but there are no qualifiers placed on the passages we have quoted in this article. We are not told to honor our father and mother only if they are honorable. We are told to care for them because it is the right thing to do. Although I have not entered this stage of life myself, I understand that it can be very difficult and draining (physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially) to care for one's aging parents. God has never promised to deliver us from difficult responsibilities, but to help us through them. Remember, obeying the commands of God is not a burden (1 John 5:3). In this case, it is simply the right thing to do.

Christians will continue to care for their aging brethren when called upon to do so. Love and duty will demand it. Unfortunately, sometimes they will do so to the shame of children and grandchildren who are neglecting their responsibilities. Let us remember to honor our father and mother - not only when we are young, and not until they pass from this life, but throughout our entire lives.